Dear Diary,

Okay, I am not going to make Java Talk a place for me to gripe about my upcoming surgery and recovery.  With that said, I am going to share my thoughts on this upcoming event today.  I first shared about this surgery a little over a week ago.  At that time, I was really twisted up over having to go through this all over again.  I was angry, I was scared, I was feeling sorry for myself, etc.

Last week was miserable for me.  I chose to stop taking my pain medicine because I must be off of it completely before surgery.  Worst...Week...Ever.  But now, I am over that hump and I realize my feelings towards this whole thing has begun to shift.  First of all, the only reason I have been able to stay so active and do the things I love to do (like walk, exercise, box, etc) is because of the pain medicine I was taking.  Now that I am not taking the medicine, I am feeling very limited in what I can do comfortably.  That is extremely frustrating.  Which is one reason for my change in attitude towards this surgery.

Now, I just want it over.  I'm ready.  Let's do this thing and get it over with.  I want to get fixed and then just get better.  I am still anxious over what I will be able to do with respect to my exercise.  That hour each day is so important to me and my mental health, I dread the thought of being unable to participate.  I mean, really, I have lost sleep over the unknown of what I will be able to do and how long it will take me to get back to what I love...boxing.

I do have a plan for this though.  I know I have to be flexible and listen to my body, but I feel much better just having a plan.  First, I will have physical therapy three times a week.  This will help me to strengthen my muscles so I can get back to life as usual.  I also have wonderful friends who have volunteered to walk the track at the Y with me.  This will be helpful because I will keep with my routine and not be isolated at home, feeling sorry for myself.  And finally, I've been working with a Trainer (because boxing in a class three times a week isn't enough for me, haha!) and he has agreed to work with me as I recover.  I will continue to get stronger with each week.  I will pray my recovery goes by quickly.  And I am excited to see the me I'll be when I'm all better.  All of these things are going to be very good for me both physically and mentally.

As the big day gets closer, I'm sure I will get nervous again.  But for now, I am ready.  Let's just do this thing.  I want to get past all of this and be better.  And I am really looking forward to the summer when I am healed, strong, and get to enjoy life with two healthy hips!

1 comment :

  1. Danielle SchreaderJanuary 18, 2012 at 1:13 PM

    I was wondering when I didn't see you in Zumba today...My prayers are with you and I hope you have a speedy recovery. Can't wait to see you at the Y again.


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